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Pun Of The Day

Monday, May 25, 2009

Con Gress

There are words that explain themselves.; you don't have to refer to a dictionary to find out the root of the word, or origin or synonyms or correct spellings etc. For instance the word FCUK. (I know it is misspelled and I am not trying to infringe the copyrights of a Fashion brand that used this scrambled form of the original word that we are so familiar with as it's fashion statement.) The F word has multiple connotations, most of them considered a profanity but many forms of this word can be used to express quite genuine feelings, like Osho explained in one of his seminars, of course he doesn't strike me as the actual mind behind the lecture, so whoever wrote it hats-off to you. And with that I will stop being vague in my references.

Unfortunately, there are words that are quite subtle in their meaning and far too complicated in the conntations they bear. One such word that has haunted the great Republic of India is the word called Congress. Once Indian National Congress, later Congress-I and now UDP. One of the everlasting ailments of our nation is this word and its derivatives.

Congress. Let's look at what the word means in general and what it has come to mean for our country.

In general Congress means a body of individuals (representatives of various sections of society) that come together for the common good and progress of all mutually dependent and/or co-habitating societies of a Nation.

In India though, Congress is not a single word, something that most of us have failed to realize even 60 years after it was formulated and inspite of all the evolution or devolution it has gone through. Congress in India actually is a concatenation of two root words,

Con: Against or opposing something, and
Gress: The flow or movement representing activity.

When we combine the two words what we get is a force that opposes the growth and development acitivities of the nation.

Ladies and Gentlemen, let me persent to you, the Congress as the United Democratic Party of India that is going to take control of the Nation once more, while we watch like idiots, surprised at how they managed to win with such a landslide mandate.

I have my theories, but I don't want to impose them on any one, I am just going to put down some random facts, you are open to interpret them as you please:

No transparency means greater control. Be it the Nuclear Deal, Stand on Kashmir, Support to politically volatile neighbours (viz. Nepal, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka and Tibet), Trade Relations, Commerce practices, you name it and you got it. All of them under the table. No one really knows what is happening, until months or years later, some wacko journalist blows his trumpet for having identified the real nuance of all the cryptic regulations that government enforced without the knowledge of the commonfolk and starts explaining how it will all be in favor of the Nation. No reason. No evidence. No facts. Just plain interpretation, on the editorial pages of the national Newspapers or News channels.

Create volatility and confusion. Bombay Terrorist attack (six months later, we are still not sure what really happened or who was responsible), Stock Market Crash (strange that government didn't get as much as even visibly perturbed on such a phenomenal rise and fall of the market. Why?)

Divide - Divide - Divide (Rule will follow automatically). I don't even see a single State, City, Community, Segment or Group of people that doesn't have alternative views on things that are common to all of us. In fact, even the neighbourhood milkman thinks that he and his needs are different from another mikman, even when both belong to the same village in Bihar, or Andhra Pradesh (it doesn't matter), and feels that he and his buffalos are far superior in terms of the milk they produce and therefore deserve better returns as compared to others. So, when you create such different opinions in people, they tend to forget that it is the strategic placement of Super Markets in the neighbourhood that is driving them out of business rather than their business rivals. Now all you gotta do is, tell milkman A that his milk is better and you will support and promot his domestic dairy over his rivals, you tell the same to milkman B and simultaneously, you give the permit and financial support to a low price super market to start selling milk that is produced by one of the government own bodies, at 1/4th the price of what is available at the nearest dairy. Finally, when the milkmen and the mall owners are trying to fight to keep their business alive, you go to them separately and tell them that you can help them in their business and ensure that the other businesses (the competitor) will be put down once you get the reigns. You can rest assured that 2 out of 3 parties that you were responsible in creating a divide in, will be favoring you in the forthcoming elections. How hard is that to do? And while these three parties were busy fighting to survive the competition, you can easily ignore mending the roads, fixing the water supplies, providing municipal services and make them appear as non-issues while the greater cause of being in business occupied the minds of everyone.

Suffocate Talent, Suppress Innovators and Small Industries. The business class people who are capable of removing the dependence of common man on governement should be completely disabled. That keeps them from bringing education, life support and progression to smaller and non-privileged sections of society. If they have no problems, they will start looking at who is ruling better, rather than who offers them bread and butter for free (not free actually, it is payed for the tax payer who benignly keeps giving away a big chunk of his earnings to be splandered amongst the governments servents, and their plans to keep the poor poor.) Now if they start dwelling on such issues, they will not be able to value the importance of a free meal once every 5 years.

This is where I am ending my first part, I am not done yet, just taking a break and giving you time to breathe... will continue from where I leave...

2 comments:

Gagan Kapoor said...

Well Said ....

I think in India we have one bigger issue while rating such people or parties - We rate them has "Who is the best"; but actually we should rate them as "Who is not the worst". I don't think there is any party who comes close to even "Good" here - forget the Best.

So the issue not only comes with just CON gress, but also with any other party you talk about.

Cheers !!

Neoriz said...

I agree. The problem is in who we are and I prefer saying we than them, because they(politicians) are at worst the true representation of what society we form as a Nation.

We are engulfed in this huge spiral of degradation; no matter where you are at present you are headed to the same little hole of inefficiency, incompetence and inconsequential existence.

Some of my friends are saying that the whole election was rigged, as congress manipulated the EVM. I think it is not required for congress to go to the extent of rigging the EVMs, because people in our country are far more easily programmable than the machines. You can simply make them turn a blind eye towards the disaster facing them. And Congress has the right spell to cast on our Nation. Every word that is said and ever protest that is held against Congress only acts as a stepping stone for the party and makes it more popular and widely accepted.

The most ironical part is that people outside India, actually believe that Congress is a party that is run by the descendants of Mahatma Gandhi (which may not be necessarily a good thing) and therefore the nation is in such safe hands. When a party can create such an image worldwide, and rule a Democratic nation as a monarchy, there is very little you and I can do to change it.

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